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Nobody's perfect, including Billy Wagner.

Back to back poor showings: maybe there's some money in alpaca farming.

Carlos is back, but he's no Hess truck: better than ever is hardly true.

The offense is awful. Terrible.

I can throw harder than Brian Lawrence. With my toes.

Where have you gone, Carlos Delgado, Shawn Green, Jose Reyes, Paul Lo Duca, Moises Alou? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.

I'm aghast.

Alejandro De Aza, Hanley Ramirez, Miguel Olivo, and Hanley Ramirez all had more hits than Delgado, Wright, and Beltran combined. What a wonderful world.

Pinch me. This must be a dream.

Mike Piazza cleared waivers. Is he available to be a defensive replacement for Lo Duca?

Daniel Barone? Kevin Gregg? Matt Lindstrom? This isn't a major league team.

Have a good night, but you might want to load up on the Ambien rather than tossing and turning and reflecting on this one.

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